You’re in the right place if at this moment you’re thinking about the hardships that may come with raising kids, but no matter how hard it can get, you just want to be good for them so that they grow up to be fine young men and women.
Parenting is indeed hard, but don’t put so much pressure on yourself trying to be the perfect parent out there. We pretty much know that no one’s perfect, but together, as parents, let’s drive and work hard to be the best version of ourselves so we can raise our children better. So, what skills does a parent need to work on to be good and have effective parenting? Here are five helpful tips for you!
- Be a good role model
It’s been studied that humans are considered special species, we imitate others’ actions to understand people better, and we also incorporate them to ourselves. This should not come as a surprise because as our child is growing up, they spend most of their time together with us in our own houses, so they see most of our actions and listen to what we say.
Children, in particular, are very keen to observe their parents. This is why you should always be careful of what you do and say around your child because they can quickly just learn and manifest them as they grow. Now, if you want your child to be well-mannered, empathetic, kind, and whatever good traits there are, you, yourself as a parent and a role model must possess and show these traits first.
- Be your child’s haven
There’s nothing better in this world than the warm connection and a strong sense of security between parents and their child. It is highly recommended for you, as a parent, to be always there for your child, to be responsive to their needs. Research by Lee Raby in 2014 showed that children who grew up feeling safe with their parents have a better performance in school. These children also go on to adulthood, having better relationships with others.
Now? How can you let your child know you have a safe space for them? One thing is to show them constant affection, support them with what they want, acknowledge, and listen to how they feel, be approachable, dependable, and trustworthy. There’s a lot of ways you can make your child feel that you’re always there for them, what you should take note with is to be just consistent.
- Practice positive discipline
Kids or young children, as we all know, are very active, and most of the time, they can barely behave, right? And they have more room for making mistakes as they explore more in daily life. This is when you, as a parent, take action to discipline your child. Now, when we say discipline, it is not synonymous with punishments like the really heavy ones that the young child cannot fully process yet as this might affect them both psychologically and socially as they grow up.
Discipline is one of the best things you can teach your child as it allows them to grow with a sense of accountability and responsibility. Your child won’t grow as someone spoiled and ungrateful.
However, disciplining a child can be stressful, and things can sometimes get out of hand. This is where practicing positive discipline comes in wherein you focus more on learning for the future rather than punishing them for what’s already done. To achieve this, you must understand the reasons behind their actions, and you should be kind and gentle but firm to them when enforcing rules.
- Teach them to view challenges positively
It’s like getting your child ready for a battle. It is undeniable that there are a lot of challenges that one person can encounter as he or she is growing up. Some problems can get really strong that sometimes we just feel hopeless. That is why it is just as crucial that you, as the parent, are there for your child whenever they are facing a challenge to help them view it more positively.
In 2014, psychologist Carol Dweck’s study showed that people who view obstacles more positively are far more likely to be successful than those who don’t. To be a good parent means helping and pushing the child not to let challenges get in the way but instead making it be something to motivate them. It is also teaching them that in difficulties, there’s more to learn that we can certainly use as long as we are alive.
- Teach them to help others
Naturally, humans are self-centered. In social psychologist Lara Aknin’s research in 2012, it showed that once we overcome our selfish nature and also look out for the needs of others, we become happier when we lend a hand.
So, if you want your child to grow up and live to be a more joyful and fulfilling life, it is better that you start teaching them on serving others and contributing something as a member of society. Also, you can involve your child in activities where they get to make a positive impact. In this way, your child can have a more meaningful life in the future.
I hope the moment you read this, and up to now, you are still committed to living a good life to be a good parent and raise some good kids. You might not see the results right then and there, but it’ll surprise you just how decent your kid could be if you’re consistent on being a good parent.